It sounds like this: “What?! They have bigger dicks?! BOMB THEM!!!” And of course, the bombs and the rockets and the bullets are all shaped like dicks. You don’t have to be a historian or a political scientist to see the Bigger Dick foreign policy theory at work. That’s what all that adolescent, macho-male posturing, and strutting in bars and locker rooms is all about, it’s called “dick fear!” Men are terrified that their pricks are inadequate and so they have to compete with one another to feel better about themselves and since war is the ultimate competition, basically, men are killing each other in order to improve their self-esteem. That’s what all that asshole, jock bullshit is all about. Men are insecure about the size of their dicks and so they have to kill one another over the idea. To me, war is a lot of prick-waving okay? Simple thing, that’s all it is, war is a whole lot of men standing out in a field waving their pricks at one another. Me? I look at war a little bit differently. I consider them to be symbols and I leave symbols to the symbol-minded.
So I don’t listen to them, I don’t really believe in my country and I gotta tell you folks, I don’t get all choked up about yellow ribbons and American flags. nothing, zero, no, and I don’t take very seriously, the media or the press in this country, who in the case of the Persian Gulf war were nothing more than unpaid employees of the Department of Defence, and who most of the time, most of the time functioned as kind of an unofficial public relations agency for the United States government. I have certain rules I live by my first rule: I don’t believe anything the government tells me. Sad to say, most Americans just roll over on command, not me. I got this real moron thing I do it’s called “thinking”, and I’m not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions. You see, I tell ya, my mind doesn’t work that way. Now you probably noticed I don’t feel about that war the way we were told we were supposed to feel about that war, the way we were ordered and instructed by the United States government to feel about that war. Now, we only bomb brown people – not because they’re trying to cut in on our action – just because they’re brown. They wanted to dominate the world! BULLSHIT! THAT’S OUR FUCKING JOB!!! Iraq, Panama, Grenada, Libya, you got some brown people in your country, tell them to watch the fuck out or we’ll goddamn bomb them! Well when’s the last white people you can remember that we bombed? Can you remember the last white- can you remember ANY white people we’ve ever bombed? The Germans, those are the only ones and that’s only because they were trying to cut in on our action.
George carlin youtube soccer moms full#
We average a major war every 20 years in this country so we’re good at it! And it’s a good thing we are we’re not very good at anything else anymore! Huh? Can’t build a decent car, can’t make a TV set or a VCR worth a fuck, got no steel industry left, can’t educate our young people, can’t get health care to our old people, but we can bomb the shit out of your country all right! Huh? Especially if your country is full of brown people oh we like that don’t we? That’s our hobby! That’s our new job in the world: bombing brown people. This country’s only 200 years old and already, we’ve had 10 major wars. and the war got good ratings too, didn’t it? Got good ratings! Well, we like war!!! We like war! We’re a war-like people! We like war because we’re good at it! You know why we’re good at it? Cause we get a lot of practice.
George carlin youtube soccer moms plus#
You know my favourite part of that war? It’s the first war we ever had that was on every channel plus cable. I’d like to talk a little bit about the war in the Persian Gulf. Thank you and hello New York! Okay, it’s been a little while, it’s been a little while since I’ve been here and a couple of things have happened in that time.